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SIDE HUSTLE BURN OUT

We are often told to have a game plan before you leave your day job and start life as a full time entrepreneur. Part of the game plan is making that entrepreneurial venture a side hustle.  When that side hustle starts to make you enough money to leave the day job, then you can safely go. Or when you have at least 6 months salary equivalent you can start your new independent life. But how often does this actually happen? And worse what happens when you burn out in the process of juggling both. The choice in my journey was to get rid of my debts, get that six months padding and then say toodles. But that doesn't happen on its own.  It's rare that your current job can give you enough margin to achieve those financial objectives in the short time an impatient entrepreneur wants to get things going. So it's either the side hustle or freelance work that will bridge the money gap.  The challenge though is, those things require energy. In my case of product creation, my side hust
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SMELL THE ROSES THEN GROW NEW ONES

My father visited me a few weeks ago. It was the first time in my life that I'd been alone with him in one house for an entire week. I was hosting, the house was mine, my first in my name (once the bond is paid off) and I wanted him to be proud. He was, but he had some thoughts on areas of improvement. It upset me, why couldn't a full 20 minutes pass before a critique followed a compliment. Then I realized, thaaaat's where I get it from. I do that to myself. Eeek! It took me two days to share with him, that, I just wanted him to be proud and not look at what could be done better. He was really sweet about it and I'll tell you what he said later. But he wasn't wrong. There was a whole lot that could be done better. I knew it, I just didn't have budget for it, his assessment was spot on but I just wanted him not assess and just beam with pride. I've wanted my father to be proud of me since I was 14 and I went to him with that 97% history result. He asked

IS "NO" FINAL?

I recently got told no. Today actually. Even had an explanation, but I was upset. Why? Why does rejection hurt, even when the reason is plausible, even when you know what you must do to turn the rejection around? Because they just do. OK there's a whole psychological (i.e. ego) basis for this but I'd like to discuss the types of nos I've experienced in my professional life and what I've learned from them. Straight up no. The "not good enough..." no. The "not now" no... The one that starts as a yes then later turns into a "we can't afford this/our strategy has changed/ we will revert and they actually don't. It's you that turns stalker because you're not the only one they are speaking with. Then there's the go back and rework it no. I work in the creative industries and I have been on the giving and receiving end of every single one of these. Every one of them sucks! WHY? As a creative(or anyone that cares about w

Butterflies = Keep it Moving (forward)

Butterflies Am I the only one on this planet that has that sick feeling in their stomach when embarking on a new venture? That feeling often leaves me confused on whether it's a signal to keep on trucking because I'm on track - or to stop right now because there's an impending crash? Do those butterflies in my tummy mean onward or retreat?  I've found for the most part, that feeling points to my need to keep it moving, forward, in and through that fear. I've more often than not found that past that threshold is an exciting new discovery like a new skill, passion, great relationship or destination. A few years ago, I got tired of that yuck feeling signalling something wonderful on the other side.  Shouldn't markers that point to all things good feel good?  Lately, I've been listening to a tonne of mindfulness podcasts and self awareness speakers and the common thread is the mind and body detests change. Even when it knows the change is for our own good

Experimental Journalling

Happy New Year!!!! Well if you know anything about me, you will know that I am a huge experimenter and I do it all in the name of personal development.  I'm also willing to put imperfect things out there so I can track my growth. So whilst spring cleaning I found a green cloth that I had planned to use as a green screen some time ago. Then I found some old journals and thought heeeeey, let me vlog as I learn how to use this thing but get into the year teaching myself something new.  Imperfect but hey we have to start and grow from there. Here's to 2018...and to more of these and to growing.  Do you journal? Have you made new year's resolutions? Follow me here: Twitter: @tendayiness Instagram: tendiextravagant Song 1 by: iTunes and Song: Fredji - Happy Life (Vlog No Copyright Music) Music provided by Vlog No Copyright Music. Video Link: https://youtu.be/KzQiRABVARk

Fail Epically

Drakensburg Being perfect is pointless because real growth comes from failing "epically" (made up word). That's what I got out of a speech I came across that Denzel Washington delivered to some university graduates. He talked about the inevitability of failure, but that we should "fall forward." More on the speech here:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAmP5JLemfs The speech resonated with me because I was in the throes of having to make a big, expensive decision that would involve going in deep, maybe beyond my means. But when THEEE DENZEL says it's OK to be reckless, it almost gave me permission to do what I wanted to do even though when I weighed the cost, it was higher than I was willing to bare.  In fairness I don't think Denzel was saying be reckless but he did make me think. When is it important to jump in head first and when to keep your head where it is and study that water surface to determine whether it is deep enough to swim in or i

Dresses of an age and imagined Tales

My sister is an avid vintage clothing collector and wearer and I've sourced these pieces from her.  I have always loved vintage, for the style but also the stories I imagined the wearer had all those decades ago.  I've created stories around these few items, and will be building on them each week.  Who do you imagine these women were? Where did they wear these items? Why don't you write your own version in the comments section?  All pieces are up for a new body to rock them.  If you'd like one or two or more, send me a mail at calmgold08@gmail.com and we'll talk Rands and cents.  Vintage love xoxo Dress 1: "My Mother's Black Dress" The Black Dress: It's 1929, I'm going to my first party. It's in the city somewhere. The city scares me, everyone there is beautiful and bold, like my mother. This is her dress, she's the stylish one. She's also the most beautiful woman I've ever met.  Me? I